I like to think of myself as a pretty nice person. I don’t eat animals, I pick up litter, I make no disparaging comments about others (for the most part) and I try to treat everyone how I want them to treat me.
So, I’m turning over a new leaf. This is kind of like the week/month that I spent NOT looking for the deeper meaning in anything and was completely vacuous and all about me and my apples. I’m just going to be a raging bitch. There’s no reason not to, at this point, because I have pretty much tried all other means of communication and personality, with a pretty large failure rate. Not that I will just go up to people and pick fights, not “Bad Girls Club” type of bitch, but the kind of bitch that is done taking it up the ass from the world.
You want waffles? Get ‘em your damn self.
Got a headache? Take some ibuprofin – you’ll be fine.
You’re living paycheck to paycheck? Suck it up, so am I, and at least you have more to fall back on than your boobs.
Wait, that came out wrong. My back boobs are totally not big enough to fall back on… I hope.
You have some silly birth certificate controversy? Millions of people hate you because you’re black? Oh, wait, yeah, that sucks, dude.