Jessie, Zack, Lisa, Screech, Mr. Belding and Slater.

Those were the days… acid wash jeans and mullet-tails.

Just in case you forgot how to style your Ponytail Mullet, I found a quick diagram.

This works well for women, too.

So, I think my fascination with Showgirls, beyond the obvious, was watching Jessie go bad. I think it was all of the pressure from her parents, or maybe that she was secretly in love with Lisa. The final theory is that she hated that Slater was a better dancer, and so she had to out-dance him, and be naked… in a pool… and almost drown.

Screech… well, he went into porn. That’s just fucked up, no pun intended.

Kelly went on to 90210 and then Lifetime movies. She should have been a stripper, too.

Mr. B… where is Mr. B??

Slater… last I saw, he was showering with Dr. Christian. Oh, wait, didn’t he dance on that other show?

So, I miss Saved by the Bell, where they tackled issues like speed addiction in 30 minutes and everything was made better by sharing a milkshake at the burger joint. It was kind of like Happy Days, only no Fonz.

Well, guess what. SAVED BY THE BELL IS OF THE DEVIL! You have all been lured into the pits of hell! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!

No, really, its true

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWs5vWks3h0

Suck on that, bitches